Friday, July 5, 2013

avocados mean business

Let me start by saying, if you have a queasy stomach... you might want to check back in with me on another day :) 

Don't you just love when a story begins that way? :) 

This is a little story about how I ended up in the Emergency Room on a fateful Tuesday night, after having sliced my finger to the bone with a kitchen knife...and all the panic that ensued. 

It all started Tuesday evening after work. Spencer and I decided to walk down to our little community center to grab some fish tacos for Taco Tuesday. After we'd ordered, we sat down and he mentioned that he meant to order some guacamole but forgot. Already having schemed a plan that involved white chocolate coated, patriotic themed, Rice Krispie treats to take to my office the following day, I offered that we just grab a couple of avocados at the grocery store on our way back and make some guacamole at home. Perfect. 

Once we arrived home, he immediately took the dog outside and I got started on the guacamole. 
Warning: This is where the preachy side of me will be unleashed.
Has anyone ever pitted an avocado by slicing it in half, cupping the other half with your hand and whacking at the pit, in order to twist and remove it? They do this on Food Network all the time. I've done it a million times myself, as it's a super handy little trick. If you also currently use this method... please don't! I did just that--and as I did, the avocado slipped slightly and I completely missed the pit, exerting every bit of energy to come slicing down at the base of my index finger. 

At first, I didn't know what had happened. I dropped the knife, and pulled up my hand. As I did, I remembered that these were brand spanking new kitchen knives (never before used... resulting in a perfectly sharp blade) and wondered what exactly I would see when I looked down. This kind of thing always happens in slow motion you know :) When I set my eyes on it, all I saw was blood... and bone. 

I ran over to my purse for my phone to call Spencer. Luckily(!) he answered. "I've just cut myself pretty badly and I need you to come inside" I told him. Once I confirmed the validity that this was not a joke, he was back inside in a matter of seconds. In the meantime, I managed to make the floor of our kitchen and dining room look like an image from a first-rate crime scene. As soon as I hung up, I had just enough time to grab a wad of paper towels and collapse into the chair as black spots were threatening a complete black out. Spencer got inside, located the nearest ER, and before I could blink, we were speeding down the highway en route to the hospital. 

We both remained as calm as possible, even though minutes into the car ride I was starting to loose all feeling in my hand. We burst into the doors of the ER looking like a hot mess. Spencer was running ahead with my purse, I was in tow holding my bloody finger together while my legs, arms, and clothing were completely blood spattered. It was a sight to behold.

Once inside, I had to get checked into triage... then wait. Spencer was already on his way back to the house as I'd left my phone and wallet on the table. It felt like hours (though in reality it was probably only 20 minutes) before I could be taken back. They were completely booked. So much so, that I never got into a room. They'd lined beds up in the corridor and were treating patients right there in the hallway. By this point, I looked part-Smurf as my hand, from the wrist down, was a lovely shade of blue. Shortly after, I met my doctor who immediately did a nerve test (to make sure there was no permanent nerve damage). He then pulled up a stool, and put seven stitches in my finger right there in the crazy ER hallway, with patient beds whizzing by, nurses shouting out a language that I didn't understand (a lot of letters and numbers) and screams from the boy next door getting his wrist reset. It was intense.

It took a long time for me to get discharged. Once my discharge nurse came to get me cleaned up and my care instructions for the next couple of weeks, she asked for at least the fifth time "so, you're sure you've had a tetanus shot in the last ten years?". Once I thought about it, I admitted that I probably hadn't... so... here we go again. As she was giving me the shot, I asked what the side affects were. "Well," she said, "we are going to keep you here for observation just in case". Oh! Neat! :)

After about 20 minutes, we were finally free to go. We returned home to what looked like a horrible murder scene, so thankful that neither of the pets went to investigate and tracked bloody paws all through the house :) Needless to say, the next day I started my 5-day vacation early (in lieu of a 4-day) since the shot in combination with the finger episode were rendering my arm completely useless. I hate missing work--but I was going to be no good :)

It's been three days now and the swelling has gone down enough that I can semi-bend my finger. I am still numb in the pad of my index finger. It might last a few more days, it might last forever. Either way... I still have my finger and it still works, so I'll take it! In the meantime, I'm doing a lot of catching up on the DVR. I even started a new series on Netflix--Revenge! I am hooked on it. I have attempted knitting, though it's slow and frustrating :) I'm sad that I'm not getting to do any of the fun crafting I had planned for the long weekend, but am using the time to take it easy--an intentional vacation. It could always be worse! :)

Let this be a lesson to all of you! PLEASE be careful in the kitchen :)

PS--The two pictures below are in black and white and do not show anything yucky! I have those, but will refrain from sharing :)

right after i shed tears of joy upon seeing spencer :)

he was gone for so long, and i didn't have a phone, and knew he was driving fast.
in an ER hallway, looking at all of the crazy things around, my mind was going 100 mph.
so, i burst into tears when i saw him :) weenie!

all cleaned up and ready to go home!

future tim burton cast member? i think so!

10 comments:

TDavenport said...

Holy crap! I slice & pit an avocado like that ALL the time! Now I will be figuring out a different way to do so thanks to your unfortunate encounter with an avocado & a knife. Yikes! I'm so glad you're ok and I hope your finger gets to feeling better soon :)

afairlie said...

Tiffany: I did too! ALL the time! They said they see this 'avocado injury' all the time since that's how Food Network tells you to do it. I personally am going back to the old 'spoon out the pit' method, though they told me in the ER to half it, then lay it on a cutting board and whack at it (not cupping it in your hand). Either way, just don't hold it in your hand anymore--please! :)

Dayna Heine said...

Ouch!!! I'm gald you are feeling better!!!!

Saskia said...

omg omg omg..i started reading it all and then i had to skim because my stomach started getting quezie..or however you spell it :)...seriously omg!

afairlie said...

Thanks, Dayna--me too!!

Haha Sas, it was pretty bad! Still no feeling in the majority of my finger--very frustrating :(

Saskia said...

is this your autocad hand? :/

afairlie said...

Sas: fortunately, it's not my mouse hand (right) but it IS my command finger :( Grrrrrr, I hate using the right click commands! #designerproblems

Cece said...

Oh how awful!! I have never cut my finger that bad. I've never had stitches. But I do think I cut my fingers way more then I should so I know I do need to be more careful. I'm glad it wasn't more serious then it was.

afairlie said...

Cece: Please do be careful! I've done that little trick a million times... who knew!? Thank goodness for good ER doctors :) Thank you for the concern!

Cristina said...

Precioso sitio, con tu permiso me quedo para seguirte!
Abrazos desde Uruguay!
http://perfumederosas-cristina.blogspot.com/

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